Getting rid of the gray...

I have been home with Avangeline all week, Monday I took her to the dr because she was conjested and I figured if she has no immune system I should get her checked out. Well as it turns out she has RSV and pneumonia. Poor little girl can't catch a break. Although her being sick really stinks it has been a very eye opening week.

First as I drove her to the ER at Children's Mercy in KC, my cell phone was about dead so I had to unplug the satellite radio to charge it. I was listening to Calvary 88, and heard a song that was new to me. The Motions by Matthew West, it goes like this:

I don't wanna go through the motions don't wanna go one more day without Your all consuming passion inside of me I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,"What if I had given everything,instead of going through the motions?"

As I walked into the ER I saw 100+ sick people... I thought I was going to have a panic attack, (I wait in the car when I take her to her family Dr.) I had no choice but to wait in the same room as all of these people. I checked in and asked what I should do as she is not to be exposed to illness given her current state. The nurse pointed me to a little hallway that was void of people, they had folding chairs set up but no one was sitting in them, so we went to the very end and sat down. I began praying that there would be a barrier put up around my little girl to protect her form all of the germs that were festering in this place, and that we would be seen quickly and not have to sit for too long. Other families entered and as they checked in they were being warned that the wait was 6+ hrs. After about 20 mins they called our name and after taking her temp, weight, and a good once over we were taken to a private waiting room. We were going to bypass the wait, and be seen as soon as a bed was available. While we waited we were joined by Hailey, she must have been 12 or so and she was having appendicitis. So they were also getting bumped to next in line. Hailey is very fond of babies so she was interested in Avangeline. Poor girl was sitting and waiting on a bed so that she could go into surgery and have her appendix removed. They had given her something for the pain, but her body was not happy. There was lots of puking going on... I don't deal well with puke... But in that room with close quarters, I was not phased. I gave her baby wipes for her face, and again right there I prayed that her little body would rest, and that her discomfort would go away. Within 5 mins she laid her head on her moms shoulder and fell asleep. Not long after that they called our name and we gathered our things. As I walked out of the room I turned to her and told her I would be praying for her.
About 4 hrs later we were able to leave the hospital and when we got in the car, the DJ was talking about prayer. He made the comment that Christians as a polite gesture will offer prayer as they part ways with someone, and then rairly do. It stopped me in my tracks. I put the van in park and prayed right then and there for Hailey. Ever happen to you??? I think it happens more often than any of us would like to admit.

Being at home all week I have watched a lot of T V as well. Oprah had an evangelist on who had been caught up in a gay sex scandal. He was married with children, and he was telling her that yes that was a part of him and that he had been forgiven and that even though it was still there he was not going to act on those feelings as they were sinful. She would not let up on the fact that gay is ok, and if that is the way you were made there is nothing wrong with that. She finally ended the conflict by being ok with him being remorseful for lying. She did not understand black and white, she was ok with the gray...
I also caught a documentary on a gay Christian duo, Jason and Demarco. They were traveling the country, spreading the good news of Gods love. Yes they had beautiful voices, and sounded awesome together. They were preaching about how God love everyone and that because they were committed to each other there was nothing wrong with being gay. You see they don't live a "gay lifestyle", they don't do drugs or have multiple partners. There were church leaders singing there praises, and asking what God thought of how twisted everything is when religion gets in the way. Religion? Black and white, they were ok with the gray...
The Dugger Wedding was on this week as well. Their family supports the idea of courtship,and the couple had committed to saving there first kiss till there wedding day. This was made out to be so strange, such a bazaar idea. Purity is such a foreign concept in our culture. Black and white there it is. With the possibility of a kiss leading to something more, they just kept it to hand holding no gray there.
So all of this has been placed on me this week...
How much gray do I put up with??? How much gray is in my life???

I think one of the greatest challenges in actively living out a relationship with Christ on earth is to avoid the trap of simply going through the motions.
I know what a "Christian" should say. I know how to act. I know how to put up a spiritual front, even if I'm not passionately seeking God. That was the inspiration behind my song, "The Motions". I was tired of settling for a stale faith. God is a God of PASSION. His true plan for our lives is anything but boring. Every day, The God of adventure beckons his sons and daughters to quit going through the motions, and walk into a life filled with passion and wonder. (Matthew West MySpace page)

Also Hope is something that you do, not something that you have. I will work on that next.